Monday, February 16, 2009
HELP!
Sleeping thru the night is a unattainable goal for Addison and I lately. She has never, maybe once slept thru the night-all the way- since she was born. It has been fine, I think she will grown out of it. I try to let her cry for 20 min. see if she will go back to sleep on her own and I always end up changing her, giving her a bottle and laying her back down. Last night was the last straw though . She woke up at 12:30 am then again at 5:30 am UP for the DAY! I am so angry!! ( and tierd) I dont know what to do, all the books say "cry it out!" that seems cruel to me, but is it the only way. I've never been around kids or babies and I really have no clue what I am doing. HELP, any advice would be greatly appreciated!
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11 comments:
Really crying it out is the best way. I know it is hard, but if you get up and rock her or give her a bottle she will wake-up just to eat. Good Luck, She'll be fine and you will be a lot happier when you are both sleeping all night.
Sucks, don't it?!! Seems like whatever method I try my kids are still crappy sleepers. We're fighting the battle with Noah right now. The method I've always liked best is where you let them cry for 15 minutes, then go in and, without saying much or picking them up, lay them back down and leave again for 20 minutes, then 30, etc. until they fall asleep. Seems not quite as cruel to me and lets them know you haven't abandoned them. Makes for a few long nights, but pretty much every method does. Of couse, this method hasn't worked so well for Noah - so on the night's he won't fall back to sleep I end up sitting quietly in his room til he does. I've decided kids have become more stubborn since a lot of these books were written! Good luck - and don't worry, eventually they're big enough that you can tell them to shut-up and go back to bed!!!
Christy I need your email address. Leave me a message on my blog. Thanks!
Let Heath take her for a night. You are not allowed to help. It will be hard, but I tell you, it worked wonders. If you can't handle it, go sleep at your mom's for the night or something. Call me back. I've left you like 5 messages. Does this mean you've given up Coke? That's the only time I get a call from you. (:
Crying it out did NOT work for Alexa. And we did it... a few times, just like eveyone said. "Oh this totally works".. blah, blah... She was extremely persistant and determined. She eventually did out grow it around 3.Jake did great with the cry it out, but yeah... each kid his own. It was easier for me to accept that was how she was, and I just tried to go with it. Otherwise I was upset. Elmo is a great distraction at 530 am. You can sleep for another hour. ;)
So sorry, Christy. It's so frustrating that their sleep habits shape our lives. Ethan wasn't a great sleeper and Emma is a gem that way...each kid sleeps different and each one responds differently to the "cry it out." I'm personally not a fan of it, but if it's best for the mom to stay sane, then that's better than lashing out, I guess. Something I've done is to go in when they're crying, pick them up and as soon as they stop crying, put them down again...and just keep doing that over and over and over. With Ethan, I'd do that and then work my way to just going in and rubbing his back for a few minutes...eventually it worked. I don't know what to tell you other than I did a lot of praying in those days...that's a great place to start. Good luck...and don't worry, I don't think any of us really know what we're doing. Being a mother is one big, frustrating guessing game.
She is too old to need a bottle in the middle of the night, so don't give her one. She isn't going to wither away without a midnight bottle. Also, you shouldn't need to change her in the middle of the night either. Nothing wakes a child up more than having the cold air hit their little bottoms. I think you are making it harder on yourself by getting her a bottle and changing her diaper. Let her cry, I hate it too, so I understand how you feel. No one ever said that motherhood was easy. It is worth it, above anything else you will ever do, but anything good, is never easy all the time. Good luck.
Here's the thing...I DO think letting them cry is probably the way for her to learn, but WAY easier said than done. For me, if I could run in and hand them a paci, or maybe rock them for a minute, and they would stop...that's what I did. She'll sort the whole sleeping thing out. Eventually. Does she have a paci or favorite animal to cuddle with? Sometimes that does the trick and they can calm themselves down without you. I'm tired today too! :(
Luckly I didn't ever have this problem and Lydia has been a good sleeper since she was 4 months. My friends told me to make sure to start her in her own bed from the start. That's where they went wrong. I have talked to more than one person who just had to let them cry it out. One kid cried for 5 hours!! I don't even think I could do that. It was a rough week but then it was done. I heard Baby Wise is a great book for this kind of thing. She is old enough now, that she knows what she is doing. She isn't in pain, she knows if she cries long enough she will win, so you have to prove her wrong. But if anything you will be a pro when it comes to your next child. good luck!
Oh man christy all i can say is I am sorry you are getting no sleep! Since i have yet to experience these sleepless nights looks like i will be needing advice from you! Or maybe Dr c could give me some advice on facebook, I dunno what do you think?? :)
I'm so sorry Christy. Not sleeping is the pits, because then you are not the person you want to be and the mom you want to be! I agree in letting Heath get her. I take the weekdays and Mike takes the weekends. If she gets up during the night on the weekends, I hardly even notice because Mike gets up and gives her a bottle and she goes right back down. I look forward to the weekends, although Brielle is overall a good sleeper
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